Sexual interruptions uncalled for
Published: Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Updated: Wednesday, March 6, 2013 16:03
There is nothing more annoying than being in the middle of a bomb sex session and hearing “Droid” from your partner’s phone as she receives a text.
Yes, as an iPhone lover the very word is lamented, but in this case I felt like picking up her phone, slamming it to the ground and gorilla stomping the crappy piece of equipment.
A sexual experience should be one of togetherness that is free of distraction.
Other than the occasional R&B playlist, sounds of passion ringing from the voices of the participants, and maybe a loose headboard, there should never be an annoying ringtone.
Entering the sexual realm, one should know to turn off his or her phone or use the handy-dandy silent switch that most phones come with.
Can a brother get a silent switch?
Or, better yet, an off switch?
It’s bad enough that the mood has been ruined.
But what’s worse is having to hear a phone tell the entire world exactly what kind of phone it is.
We do it at the movies, in class and on airplanes — places where people may need peace.
Yet some can’t remember to hit the silent button in the bedroom.
Imagine you’re approaching climax, she’s in her zone as well, and just before “show time” you hear that fabulous Marimba tune from his or her iPhone.
Not only should the phone be shot, but the owner should be as well because now the focus of the moment is thrown off and you’re forced to start all over again.
Yes, good sessions are not quiet, in fact they can be somewhat nerve-racking for those who are involved, at times.
But this is the nature of the business — the human nature of the business to be exact.
These sessions are the reasons we exist.
Though looked down upon at times by society, sex is the most important act human beings can engage in.
Without it our species would come to a screeching halt. Luckily, it is fun and exciting, like playing a favorite video game title.
When plugged into nature’s Playstation, however, is not an appropriate time for friends to butt-in, unless the couple is into that sort of thing. For the most part, this kind of game should not have a multi-player mode where friends can send instant messages interrupting a gamer session already in progress.
Though fun like a game and serious like a career, sex finds itself somewhat in the middle. So it must be respected.
It is stimulating to all senses and brings incomparable pleasure to those who choose to partake.
Some consider sex, to a certain degree, a sin. But how can procreation be evil? It is in our nature to have sex and I for one never want to live in a world where the act is condemned — for condemning sex is condemning humanity.
There is nothing wrong with two people, who love, like or lust after one another, “doing it” as long as it is consensual and done in a respectful manner for both parties.
Sex is a time to share, minds, bodies, hearts and souls while having a blast. However, it is not a time to share eardrum-piercing tones from a trashy phone.